Saturday, January 5, 2013

Added another "Topic"

I added a new topic that I will be writing about. I've been thinking a lot about my health lately and am trying some new things and a new way of thinking. I feel compelled to write about it and share :) The link to my other topic is on the right side of the page.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Exchanging Pain for PTSD....GRRRR

I've learned a great to describe Dean's injuries is like a tripod: 1)TBI; 2)Pain; 3)PTSD

Whenever someone has pain, no matter what else they have going on, getting rid of the pain takes top priority! So for the last two years our main priority has been to address his pain level which gets up to a 9 on the pain scale and with hydrocodone can be taken down to a 4. He doesn't like being on 5 hydrocodones a day so we've tried to address it in other ways as well. For the past couple months we've actually been able to get his pain consistently at a lower level and he's only taking 3 hydrocodones per day. Great!

It seems, however, that when as his pain has been greatly reduced he's becoming more of an ass! We put the fire out, so to speak, and now we see the water For two years I've thought that his PTSD wasn't a HUGE deal...yes, it makes his TBI worse, but his PTSD only reared it's head with things like noises and people behind him. Not anymore!

  • The other day he was looking at his mail and one of his packages had some damage (not the item inside, just the package) and he flipped out and starts yelling at me.
  • He was walking from the living room to the dining room and little Dean crossed his path, he flipped out and screamed at little Dean and made him scared and cry.
  • I asked him if he'd come and drink some water since he hadn't had much to drink that day and lack of drinking fluids makes him sick, he said "I'm not drinking any fucking water!"

He has been making the house a place where we are all walking around on eggshells and jumping down our throats for little things (which is unlike him). I don't really want to touch him, or kiss him, or sit by him, or talk to him. I'm becoming resentful and I hate it! Then he wonders why I'm being a "bitch" (that's how my distance is interpretted) and we can't really talk about it because of what I explained in my last post :(